I had an interesting chat with my son over the weekend who was having his 6th birthday party. He was struggling about inviting one of his friends to his party. When I asked him why, he said, “Because no one likes her.” Apparently his friends were pressuring him not to invite this friend. I pulled out the “momma” (you know what that is, don’t you ladies) and stated, “How would you feel if YOU were her – being left out? Wouldn’t you want your friends to invite you?” – oh ya, I went there.
He didn’t want to think about it. He was torn between the opportunity of really “feeling” what someone excluded might feel and wanting to just please his friends and have a good time. In his six year old world, he was experiencing the tension of seeing brokenness and the desire to run from the frustration it creates.
Why? Because it doesn’t feel good.
When I hear about the thirteen year old in my city who died by getting caught under a fence while skateboarding, my body heaves over in pain. I can’t take it. ”Turn off the news!” I don’t even think of reaching out to the parents because that means embracing the pain square in the face. ”What would I say?”
My friend who has opened her day home doesn’t know how to respond when the parents show up to drop off their four year old high on drugs. ”I never asked for this”, she states out of frustration.
We see the homeless on the street or a neighbour in desperate need, but don’t know how to respond.
Jeff Goins book answers the question we all struggle with when faced with brokenness we can’t fix: “What am I supposed to do?” He isn’t afraid to engage the ugly tension in face head-on and tackle it. After reading the book, I’m not afraid of brokenness. I’m free from the expectation that I have to “solve” it. I’m ok with the unknown between seeing need and embracing it. Goins states, “It’s about living in the tension of a broken world and being content with the journey, no conjuring some contrived sense of arriving.”
When speaking to others along the lines of making a difference, I’m finding that people aren’t lacking in desire. Everyone wants to do something about poverty, abuse, hurt, pain… its just too hard to face it. It “wrecks” us. How can we ever be normal again? What would really happen if we allowed it to inconvenience our hearts, lives and schedules? We walk away. Like my son, no one wants to think about it.
Jeff gives the answer to the question: “How do you move through this tension, avoiding shame and inaction alike?” I’m not going to reveal the answer to you. The book will tell you. Check it out! It’s a great read.
Get ready to get wrecked.
To purchase your copy of “Wrecked”, click here